go go go go!
I am going through three major life changes right now: a move, a marriage, and a new job. Any of the three of these would typically be enough to throw me off or knock me out for a good long while. How am I able to handle all this? How is each major push of force and adrenaline not followed by the requisite crash? Among other things, there are instinct, desire, delayed gratification, and humility.
I think I’m learning how to ride the wave of adrenaline. Everything is in such a state of transition around me that it I can learn to expect to work abnormally hard and I can remember to rest and regroup before absolutely necessary because it is obvious to me that I will have to work abnormally hard again in the near future. I can feel my instincts taking over a little bit: demanding more sleep in the morning, craving specific foods, demanding a silent meditation time. I listen and respond and I am rewarded. I feel alive and effective in the world!
Another driving factor is motivation. Every one of these new things is something that I want and that I can feel are for my own benefit and therefore for the benefit of the world (one good thing brings out another, I find). Having the drive to move all my worldly possessions, or do interpersonal work with my partner, or make lists and email and text and meet up to prepare for a celebration feels easy because these tasks are an obvious part of the good that is happening in my life.
I listen to my instincts, I want the change that the work is bringing about, and I know that there is an end in sight. My partner and I have scheduled a long break where we have nothing to do except for rest and replenish ourselves, and take time out to sink in our love for each other. Knowing that after the push there will be a relaxation time makes the daily effort feel like something fun and special, not an endless drone.
The last and most important reason I have been able to keep working so hard is that I have help all around me. Knowing that there is so much change and transition happening in my life all at once, I have by grace learned how to accept help from others. When someone offers me help I normally like to say, “oh no, I got it” and move on. Recently I say “yes!” It is sometimes followed by “…and I’m not sure what yet,” since I am a relatively new Help Acceptor, usually though, I can share the work. Ask my friends, I am accepting generosity every day! It is a fun and exciting practice. I am becoming available to accept the help that is offered to all of us at all times by strangers or the folks we know and love. It’s always somewhere. We can find it.
I can learn to accept more help and become a part of a culture of increasing interreliance! I can schedule times of rest after the heavy pushes in life. I can move when I know what it is I really want. I can listen to what my body is asking me to do and ride the wave.
This is a fun time.